Is it just me that likes new beginnings? Personally I love them...only if they're good though!
It's a chance for a fresh start, to wipe the slate clean, to create new memories and build new relationships plus so much more.
This past week or so there have been loads of new beginnings for me, in fact there are still more to come if I'm honest with you. Am I scared? Yeah sure. Who isn't scared when it comes to change? But you've just got to embrace it and let life do it's thing. I found out quite a bit of bad news recently, it's very personal so I'm not going to get into it but it got me thinking...for so long I have hated change, for so long I have held back quite a lot and stood far away in the distance from so many things. Why did I do that? To be honest, I couldn't tell you why ; its who I am I suppose? I've been like it for as long as I can remember (although I have a rubbish memory so who knows how long that is haha), and then along came my dreaded anxiety which made it worse than what it was and I just got sort of stuck in this rut of unhappiness, being anxious and insecure until one day I broke out of that, not very much but enough to be able to live my life again and to not be so scared all the time but it wasn't until recently that slowly that shell is starting to break more and more and the human behind it (me) is starting to show, to come out and actually experience life a bit more than before. It feels good, it honestly does. Sure I still have my inner demons in there and things still make me anxious, upset or scared but I'm a human being so no matter what that is going to happen regardless but it's not as bad as before. It took some bad news to make me realise that you only have one life so you have got to live it to fullest that you possibly can...which is the reason for my new beginnings.
It's a chance for a fresh start, to wipe the slate clean, to create new memories and build new relationships plus so much more.
This past week or so there have been loads of new beginnings for me, in fact there are still more to come if I'm honest with you. Am I scared? Yeah sure. Who isn't scared when it comes to change? But you've just got to embrace it and let life do it's thing. I found out quite a bit of bad news recently, it's very personal so I'm not going to get into it but it got me thinking...for so long I have hated change, for so long I have held back quite a lot and stood far away in the distance from so many things. Why did I do that? To be honest, I couldn't tell you why ; its who I am I suppose? I've been like it for as long as I can remember (although I have a rubbish memory so who knows how long that is haha), and then along came my dreaded anxiety which made it worse than what it was and I just got sort of stuck in this rut of unhappiness, being anxious and insecure until one day I broke out of that, not very much but enough to be able to live my life again and to not be so scared all the time but it wasn't until recently that slowly that shell is starting to break more and more and the human behind it (me) is starting to show, to come out and actually experience life a bit more than before. It feels good, it honestly does. Sure I still have my inner demons in there and things still make me anxious, upset or scared but I'm a human being so no matter what that is going to happen regardless but it's not as bad as before. It took some bad news to make me realise that you only have one life so you have got to live it to fullest that you possibly can...which is the reason for my new beginnings.
List of my New Beginnings :
(some are personal and I don't want to broadcast them all over the internet so here are just a few)
- My YouTube channel (www.youtube.com/c/ThatAmateurActress97) is relaunching again - I've missed being a YouTuber, I've missed creating content and doing the one thing that I love therefore I decided to come back and take a crack at it again. Now I'm not saying its going to be perfect and that there is going to be videos every week because although that is my aim life does get in the way sometimes. Lets be honest here I could have a crappy anxiety day which makes me not want to upload and to be honest that is more than likely going to happen at some point but I don't want to force myself if I'm not feeling great and I also don't want to feel bad for missing a video one week which is how I was constantly feeling before I disappeared off the YouTube scene for a while and it was just getting me down so I decided to leave but I never mentioned it because I knew I wasn't leaving for good, I knew I was going to come back one day I just didn't know when so I never really mentioned the fact that I was leaving for a while. However, I went away and had a think to myself and I thought "Do you know what? I'm not the perfect YouTuber and I'm not a perfect person I'm going to have bad days when I don't want to upload, things are going to happen which stop me from uploading that week and I just need to accept that and not feel bad about it and just keep trying and keep going instead of feeling so bad that I just leave one day. So therefore, I have come back and I plan to keep going this time because I truly do love doing YouTube and I have missed it loads if I'm being honest with you. So go check out my channel and subscribe for new content! (cheeky plug there haha, sorry!)
- My Blog (The one you are reading right now!) is also relaunching- I have a passion for writing just like I do for YouTube which is the whole reason I started a blog, to write (duh!) but I never really did much about this blog which you can tell from my previous posts...and I just had this feeling that I wanted to start writing again about anything and everything which caused this blog to pop into my head. I thought that this would be the perfect outlet for that so here I am! :)
Those are the only two new beginnings that I'm going to share with you, they may seem pathetic to some of you and you may be wondering why I'm making such a big fuss about them but to me they are a big thing therefore I'm going to make a fuss about them because at the end of the day it's my life and I can do what I want. :D
All the best!
-Megan Marie
xo
xo
Love this Meg!! <3
ReplyDeleteThis is great!
ReplyDeleteThank you :)
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